Structure and Fluidity

It was a Druidic figure that first came to me, one like the Hermit tarot card, during my first Processwork Workshop Intensive. This figure had been with me for many years .. it is about turning within to find your own light, while being a guide for others - later the figure returns as the Hierophant, a teacher. Twenty years previously I had tried studying Druidism but gave up. It felt made up, drawing on many sources without a completed synthesis that my Virgo stellium could feel comfortable with.

Though this was a Processwork event, it was my call back into Shamanism.

The next ally that I worked with was a Polar Bear I called Nanook. He came to show me how to tread water, how to allow all that I thought was the ground beneath me - dissolve. Melt away and learn to trust in my own inner resources, you can meet him in Navigating Chaos and Confusion: Advice from a Polar Bear.

This lesson came back to me recently when mist ( liminal space) descended while I was walking in the hills. Rather than try to find my way, with an increasingly wet map ( Yes! I forgot my map holder!), I dropped down to the river to find familiar terrain, walk back to the road if need be - there was no need to panic, only a mild reluctance to extend my walk.

This is what Polar Bear taught me. There are times when everything falls away and we have to swim further to find nourishment. Go beyond our believed capacity and wait, further refining our patience, deepening our resolve and resilience, until the new starts to form. Out of that long, dark, cold, wet winter of a sea, the ground starts to reform and a new purpose is born and flourishes.

What does the new look like? How do we reform structure? I sat with this enquiry for nearly two years. How can I meld fluidity with structure? I mention my Virgo stellium - Virgo are a mutable sign which means they are adaptable ( for the astrologers I’m a Libra and also have a Scorpio stellium !). Give them a structure and they’ll adapt … but here I was being asked to draw on other parts of my chart my 10th house and Saturn in Aries to create my own. This was a big learning for me, a significant change from adapting to what is - into being a Creator and owning that.

But what does that look like ? I played for a long time with my perception of structure. And what felt like the impossible task of allowing my fluidity and creativity freedom, without being rigidly contained, to flow and overflow like a River does. How can we release the structures that scaffold our lives ? I had images of huge iron rusty scaffolding rising out of Sednas dreams in the deepest oceans … harvesting her deepest hidden treasures - everyway I looked it became a patriarchal nightmare. How can I be seen as me, rather than trying to fit into something that simply cannot contain me for who I am and what I am becoming ? I was handing in my assignments in pictorial form, even on Pinterest once !

Then one day, Boom !, the inspiration came … a Coral Reef ! This is the epitome of an adaptable organic structure. Diversity and interconnectedness in action, all needs met, welcomed and catered for - with Vibrancy ! Essential for me this world flourishes just below the waters surface. A liminal space offering a protective barrier to a world where only those curious enough to lean in and enquire can really see and get to know. By combining their resources the inhabitants are stronger and act as a unit, which in turn is a form of mutual benefit and protection … and so much more.

“Welcome to my World ! ”

with much Love,
From my Heart to yours,

Tania Aurora White Crow